Grammar rules :o)

1. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.

4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

5. Avoid clichés like the plague. (They're old hat.)

6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.

7. Be more or less specific.

8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.

9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

10. No sentence fragments.

11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.

12. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

14. One should NEVER generalize.

15. Comparisons are as bad as clichés.

16. Don't use no double negatives.

17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

20. The passive voice is to be ignored.

21. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.

22. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.

23. Kill all exclamation points!!!

24. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

25. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth-shaking ideas.

26. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.

27. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."

28. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.

29. Puns are for children, not groan readers.

30. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

31. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

32. Who needs rhetorical questions?

33. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

34. Ewe can knot bee two careful wren using homonyms.

35. Edit for mispellings.

My marking is all done now! Yay! Now on to the thesis and the remaining Christmas preparations. Seven days until Las Vegas...

It never ends...

Well it will end, my marking that is, when I am done marking the last 14 reports of 34 and sections C and D of 34 exams. Tomorrow. I want it done tomorrow, so I can work on my thesis. To bed now.

Tooth troubles

Over the last month, I have been in the process of getting a crown on one of my back teeth. This same tooth has had an internal cavity filled when I was a child, a root canal done when I was 12, and has been cracked for 6 years and needing this crown. I didn't know what kind of a rigamorole this was going to be. By the time I am finished with the process (next Monday hopefully) I will have spent more time in the dentist chair in just over a month than I have in the past 4 years combined.

The most frustrating part is living with a temporary tooth while waiting for the permanent tooth to be ready. Monday the temporary popped off while I was eating a Halloween-sized Oh Henry bar. Damn nugat! So that afternoon, I went back to the College of Dentistry to get it glued on again. Then Tuesday night the stupid thing popped off again during dinner. I had to pawn a piece of gum off of someone to temporarily adhere my temporary back in my mouth again. So it is back to the dentist's office again with me this afternoon. I can think of a billion ways I would rather spend my time. Strangely enough, marking is one of them.

My pre-Halloween weekend...

I have been busy lately, and lately most of it has been fun stuff. Thursday I had a highly anticipated lunch with her at Louis, then that night (after my students wrote their midterm) I ended up at Gracie's Off Broadway again for Tina's birthday bash and then to the Black Duck Freehouse for a nightcap. It was a ton of fun.

Friday night was the opening night for Saw II, a gory horror movie sequel to the surprise hit Saw of last year. I have been looking forward to this movie and apparently it blew away the box office this weekend opening up at $30.5 million, twice what the big-budget Legend of Zorro opened with. It was pretty good too, and did justice to the twists and turns of the first movie. Rumour has it that after this successful weekend at the box office there may be a Saw 3 in the works. I am such a sucker for a horror movie.

Saturday evening, a friend and I went out for sushi then to the Royal Winnipeg Ballet's production of Dracula at the Centennial Auditorium. It was a breathtaking performance with sumptuous costumes, elegant scenery, and lithe dancers doing stunning jettes and plies all over the place. I was quite impressed.

Tomorrow night, I get to go to Brennan's house to hand out candy to all the little kids out Trick-or-Treating. That is my favourite part of Halloween. But for now, it is time to get back to the world of marking job packages and midterms.

If Saskatoon ever became zombified, I would be an...

Official Survivor Congratulations! You scored 83%!

Whether through ferocity or quickness, you made it out. You made the right choice most of the time, but you probably screwed up somewhere. Nobody's perfect, at least you're alive.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 68% on survivalpoints

Link: The Zombie Scenario Survivor Test written by ci8db4uok on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

The loss of a great mind

Wayne Booth, one of the greatest rhetoricians of this century, passed away on October 10th. Here is the article about him in the New York Times. Rest in peace.

My life since my last post...

teach mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark teach teach mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark mark...

I am sensing a pattern here. Back to, you guessed it, marking :o)

So tired

I am absolutely wiped today and it isn't even 3pm. Myrah is continuing her early morning (before 4:30am) wake-up calls. Getting to bed isn't the problem is is her tearing around, meowing, chewing on plastic, batting tv antennas, knocking everything off my bedside table, and such that interrupts my sleep. I need an apartment with a bedroom door so I can sleep in peace and she can still have access to her food and litter.

My class looks good today. They were responsive and intelligent, which is appreciated. Thesis work is going so slow as I am practically sleeping on my desk. I grabbed a coffee from Tim's to jump start the system, but I think I may be a lost cause until the morning. I am going to bed earrrrrrrrrrly tonight so I can compensate for being woken up well before I need to be. I sense this term is going to be a tiring one.

It isn't the beginning of term without a little panic

My oh my... tomorrow marks the first day of the new school year. This term I am teaching 2 classes instead of one, which is super exciting. I had originally thought that both of these classes were to be scheduled for Tuesdays and Thursdays, but I found out about an hour ago that in fact I am teaching one class on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. This should be exciting and difficult as it is much different trying to teach material in 2 80 minute classes versus 3 50 minute classes. I am interested to see how it all plays out. I am prepared for tomorrow though, as far as I understand it, no one has had a chance to register for the class as PAWS (the campus wide computer system) is down right now. So I may go to class tomorrow morning to discover an empty room. This will be interesting.

In the meantime, I need to get back to my thesis...

Distractions

I have to confess that I am addicted to only one reality show right now (crosses fingers that this doesn't change when the new fall line up comes out). It is Rock Star INXS. VOTE FOR SUZIE! There. Now my loserdom has been revealed to all. I will hang my head in shame just as soon as the season is over.

Anyhow, while browsing for spoilers on Television Without Pity I came across another fasinating musical distraction The Truck Driver's Gear Change Hall Of Shame. Here is their description of what this musical device is and does:

Many writers and arrangers feel that when their song is in risk of getting a bit tired, it can be given a fresh lease of life by shifting the whole song up a key, usually in between choruses, towards the beginning of a "repeat-till-fade" section. You may have heard this technique informally referred to as "modulation", but the correct ethnomusicological term for the phenomenon is the truck driver's gear change. This reflects the utterly predictable and laboured nature of the transition, evoking a tired and over-worked trucker ramming the gearstick into the new position with his – or, to be fair, her – fist.

Contrary to what many people seem to think, the truck driver's gear change is in no way inventive, interesting or acceptable: it is in fact an utterly appalling and unimaginative admission that you've run out of inspiration and the song should have ended one minute ago; but you're under pressure to make something which can be stretched out to the length of a single.


I find this site and the sample snipets hilarious, but I think I may find myself unconciously listening for the gear shift in all music. I may have ruined some of my favourite cheesy tunes forever.

New Pants!

I lurve the lady who does my nails! She was cleaning out her closets and because I am one of her favourite clients and about the same size, she gave me 4 pairs of jeans, a pair of PINK cords, and a cute skirt and shirt outfit. They are so comfy and in great condition. I can't wait to wear them all. Hooray for cheap as free clothes!!

This just seems like a strange result

Woody Allen Your film will be 74% romantic, 37% comedy, 26% complex plot, and a $ 30 million budget.

Be prepared to have your life story shot entirely in New York City -- though lately Woody's been loving shooting in London. Also, your music soundtrack is all jazz from before 1949. Filmography: Annie Hall, Manhattan, Stardust Memories, Everyone Says I Love You, etc. Woody has released one film per year consistently for the past 35 years. For the past 15 years he's been trying to make films like his older, funnier ones, just like characters in his Stardust Memories film suggest throughout. Regardless of his personal life (btw, his current wife was never *his* daughter), his films are American classics.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on action-romance You scored higher than 99% on humor You scored higher than 99% on complexity You scored higher than 99% on budget

Link: The Director Who Films Your Life Test written by bingomosquito on Ok Cupid

More photos

I put pictures up on my Photo page from some of the things that have been going on a while back like my birthday dinner...



And a luxurious evening at home...

I love audiobooks

I just finished listening to Stephen King's The Green Mile on audiobook tonight. I have always loved audiobooks since my Dad introduced me to them when I was in my midteens. He would go away on business trips and always had a good mystery or two to pass the time on the same stretch of highway he often travelled. When he would get back, I would snag the tapes and listen to them in my room for hours while I did mindless chores like folding clothes and organizing papers. I still like to do that. I like to read a good book now and then, but sometimes nothing beats having someone else read you a story :o)

A lovely evening...

It has been a rough week for me already and it is now only a half hour into Wednesday. Tonight, though, was a nice excursion to take a break from the ongoing stress of thesis writing. I went for a belated birthday dinner which was absolutely amazing (salmon, pesto and pepper linguini, mixed green salad, asparagus, and kaluha chocolate cake... YUM), complete with an anti-stress bath package which was just what I needed. When I came home I still felt a wee bit down, and within 5 minutes of setting down my purse, a great friend of mine called to see if I wanted to go for a glass of wine at the best new restaurant in Saskatoon, Gracie's Off Broadway. It was lovely. We are going there for dinner on Saturday and I already know what I am having, in fact, the chef is saving some ingredients especially for my risotto that night. It should be wonderful. I am going to curl up in bed with Myrah for a peaceful night's sleep.

By popular demand

More pictures are on my photo site, including my birthday toes :o) Thanks for the pedicure, Brennan!

Still working

Well the deadline has come and gone and I am still working on my thesis. I had grandiose plans of getting work done today and they went out the window when the building that houses my office was evacuated before I got there. It would make for a nice quiet work day except for the poisonous gasses wafting through the halls.

My kitchen looks lovely right now. All my dishes are done and I installed a couple of little lights underneath my cupboards to shine on my counter. It really makes my kitchen more inviting.

Well, back to work I suppose...

No internet and no phone make Laura something something...

Go crazy! Don't mind if I do!

The summer of construction outside my window has had a more immediate effect on my life other than the 6 days a week of noise... they cut my phone line! So if anyone is trying to get ahold of me, I am using my cell... that I never ever use. If you don't have my number, email me (which I check from the U) and I will send it to you.

It is t-14 days until the deadline, but I am having my doubts. My supervisor has been MIA most of the month and I am feeling off track in some of my chapters. I am working constantly, but the end isn't clear yet. Oh well, back to work!

All By Myself...

All my colleagues have been away at a conference for the past week, so my office has been dead quiet that whole time. There is no one to go for lunch with, no one to chat and commiserate with, no one at all. I have been fairly productive, but the quiet is starting to drive me batty. I just hammered out a brand new outline of the whole thesis, but I need some face-to-face time with my supervisor to confirm that this is the direction I should be heading. I don't know when she is back in town. Oh well, I will just keep working and hope I am not regressing... again ;o)

Good news!

I am getting enough money for the car that I should be able to replace it with a fairly decent model. Yay!

In other news, I went on my annual Mud Run last night. My Mud Run is where I go out running with the purpose of getting dirty, so I can come home and have a super hot shower and clean up. It was so rainy and dreary most of yesterday that I thought it would be the perfect day, but by the time I got a chance to go running, it had turned into a sunny evening. I had to be happy with splashing in the remaining puddles rather than getting DIRTY. I guess I can suffer...though, I might just have to take advantage of the next time it is nasty out :o)

Car update

The car is a total loss. Now I have to wait for SGI to determine the market value and cut me a cheque. I was really hoping that the car was fixable. This is turning into a pretty big hassle.

Feeling better

It is funny how a day of mellowing out can really make me feel better. I didn't do a heck of a lot on the thesis yesterday, but I really wasn't in any sort of mindset to do much of anything. I am still waiting on insurance to get back to me so we can get that stuff moving.

Today I feel raring to go on it, which is nice. I think I might try out the campus gym today to work up a sweat. And tonight, I am gonna try and make some light changes while watching the season finale of The Apprentice. Oh, someone cure me of my addiction to certain reality TV shows!

Well, back to work :o)

2 cars and counting...

I got into a car accident yesterday evening. I am okay and they are okay, but the cars are not okay. It looks like I will be back with SGI again. I am just hoping that my car can be fixed, rather than having yet another write off. Well, I had better get back to work.

T-51 days and counting...

I handed in a draft of ch 3 to my supervisor today. She seemed pleased. I was pleased to quit working on the sucker. My brain is now dragging to get to ch 4, the Connie chapter. I could really use a boost on that one. I think I will tackle the overall structure first, to make it parallel with ch 3, then start looking where I need to fill-in-the-blanks in my argument. If I make some of these global changes to the draft today, then tomorrow can be an intensive editing day. Hmmmm... maybe I should watch my Connie tape tonight, so I am still working on my thesis a bit, but it is really light work. That will help prevent that nasty brain fog I had last week. Sounds like a good plan to me.

Back to work!

T-52 days and counting

It is funny how when you have an intensive writing project, so many other fun things come up that you want to do. Alas, "no" is now a regular staple in my vocabulary, but only to the fun stuff. I am beginning to wonder if the countdown is for when the thesis should be done or if it is the day I will finally be rid of this massively annoying project. I am quite excited for the day when I can say, "I have no thesis work to do!" I think 52 days might be a bit short though, that doesn't count the committee revisions, the defence, the binding, or all the paperwork that needs to go to grad studies (well, not that much, but it is there).

At least I will have half a summer :o)

Well, back to work!

T-56 days and counting

I woke up yesterday with a fog over my brain. I didn't feel like I could be productive at all. It think that was a sign to change my work habits a bit. Thirteen hour days of intensive editing give me hangovers, so I am going to balance the intensive nose-to-the-page editing with some lighter tasks so that I don't get sidetracked.

I wrapped up my work at SIAST yesterday as well, though there may still be some more marking trickling in by Friday. Teaching at that college was a great learning experience, and I might even consider doing it again if I have time in my workload next year. I am a little freaked at the prospect of next year, but I will worry about that after the defence.

Back to work!

All by myself

The university is one lonely place once May hits. I am here working on the thesis (t-58 days and counting) and there is barely a soul around. Not a single colleague to commiserate with. I guess that means I will just have to work.

Speaking of work... here is a little article I found quite inspiring for some strange reason:

Lucas forced himself to write Episode III

Hollywood mogul George Lucas struggled so much with writing the screenplay for final Star Wars installment Episode III - Revenge of the Sith, he had to force himself to stick to a rigid working day as he sought inspiration. The hugely successful movie-maker, 60, took on the persona of a normal office worker as he sat at his desk for nine hours a day, five days a week - and he still only managed to produce five pages everyday. He says: "I am very diligent about writing. I go to work at 8.30am and leave at 6pm. I sit there with that page in front of me but I still can't write it. "I do get it done, I actually write five pages a day. But I force myself - otherwise I would probably write a page a day."

I am not a big George Lucas fan, but it is nice to know that some of the most successful people in the world have similar writing struggles.

Conspicuous absence

Well, after a month of heavy marking and thesis writing, I had my committee meeting yesterday. I have a firm and fast deadline for the completion of my thesis... July 1st. The defence is anticipated for sometime in the last half of July, because one of my committee members will be in town then anyhow. It looks like I have my work cut out for me in the next 2 months. This is both exciting and terrifying to me right now. Back to work.

Car update

Well, SGI declared my car a write off and has decided it is worth $800, subtract the $700 deductible and I get a whopping $100 for my inconvenience. They get to sell the car off for parts and my $700 deductible. I feel absolutely ripped off now, more ripped off when the damn thing was stolen. The police are closing the case because there were no prints recovered and I am left to get another vehicle.

Thank goodness my parents are willing to help me out finding another junker until I am done school and making a bit of money and not paying tuition.

Some April Fools day...

I awoke this morning at 6:15am to the phone ringing. It was the city police. Apparently, my car was stolen and recovered before I even knew it was missing. It was found on the other side of the city when someone reported a suspicious vehicle parked on the street. I can get it back from the impound lot later this afternoon, but I guess a window is broken and there is damage to the steering column that will need to be fixed. On the other hand, how lucky am I that I will even get my poor little junker back... so many vehicles get stolen and the owner's never see them again, and the few repairs to my car is going to be less expensive than trying to replace the whole car.

Of all days too... I went and checked my spot to make sure someone wasn't just playing a joke on me. All that was in my parking spot was broken glass and the part of the steering column that the thief ripped off to hot wire it.

Mother Nature's response

She decided to send me fishtailing down a major overpass and has now decided to hold my car hostage in its own parking spot. Oh well... I am going to have some hot tea and go to bed... she can't be this mean tomorrow too ;o)

Open letter to Mother Nature

Quit screwing around with all this white crap and give us a real spring already!!!!

Sincerely, Laura

Well, the only good thing about this weather is that it has put me back in the mood to try my hand at making mulled wine. Maybe I will do that one evening while the snow still flies.

Morning at the University

Well, I am up and I am here. I just finished my delicious banana chocolate chip muffin and I am sipping my English Breakfast tea. It is so peaceful, I am dreading the thought of tainting this with work.

I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately, but what I think I really want is more time to do some things that really ground me, like cleaning and organizing. I really really want to get my pile of papers organized and filed, which is a project I have procrastinated on for months. All I need to do is pick up some hanging folders, two racks to convert my cabinet into one that can accommodate hanging files, and some labels then I can plow through this paper party in one day I am sure of it.

I don't feel completely disorganized, but there are certain things in my surroundings that I find quite draining... and this paper pile is one of them. The other is my thesis.

I have been working on it and working on it, but I don't feel like I am making progress because I am not getting many new pages, but I am making improvements to the writing of each of the chapters. I just want this thing to be done now. I know I will get it done, I just want it to be sooner than later.

Treated myself

I went today and picked up the latest CD by Tori Amos called "The Beekeeper." I am quite pleased with it. It is great background music for puttering around my apartment.








I finally unpacked a box that my parents gave me from my grandmother's old things when they were cleaning out her condo. It is a lovely set of china for 8. It is cream with silver flowers and trim. I absolutely adore it. I think I might finish up my marking with a cup of tea in one of the cups and saucers from the set. I love being a girl :o)

Plugging away

Today is a desk day if ever there was one. I have plunked myself behind my desk and don't plan on going very far until I have some solid work done on Chapter 5 of the thesis. I am planning on going on a little excursion to Edmonton on Thursday morning to visit Jimmy for a few days. That will be a welcome break after all this intense work.

This past week, with some much-needed help from Brennan, I rearranged my apartment. It is funny how refreshing it is to have slightly different surroundings. Myrah freaked out a bit with the changes, but she has settled in nicely. I am enjoying the much airier feel of my apartment now. Also, my computer has been brought out of the dark ages of Win 98 and right into the present with Win XP. That has really improved the day-to-day operation of my computer.

Well, I shouldn't take too long a break to blog, so I am off to chain myself back to my office desk. Ta ta!

The New Term

Welcome to 2005... albeit a bit late, but that is not a problem. I am in the middle of a new term and have news. I took on a new job. So now, in addition to writing my thesis and teaching at the U, I will also be assisting another teacher at the local tech college. It is a good course, but definitely a different scene from my students right now. The money will really help out as I am finding it tougher and tougher to make ends meet with just the one job.

Speaking of money, I am counting the seconds until payday. It is only at the end of the each month, but my last paycheck came on Dec 24th. So I am waiting a week longer for pay and the last paycheck overlapped with Christmas and travel and generally excessive spending. Eek!

As for new years resolutions, I have been making it to the gym a lot this year, and I have been making lunches for myself fairly regularly. The Bacon Buffeteria is a bit on the pricey side when you eat from it everyday... and as dubbed, features bacon in just about every dish. Bacon is my arch nemesis. Down with bacon! Well, I will continue my crusade against cured pork products tainting my meals another time. In the meantime I have to slog through a few more assignments.